Milk means many things to many people. Some use milk as a sports drink after a workout, to help them recuperate their electrolytes and energy. Others are incapable of digesting lactose, which is a protein in milk. This condition, which affects about 75% of the adults in the world, leads many of them to not drink milk at all. Potentially due to the lack of adults that can drink milk, kids are seen as the only people that drink it. The flavors of milk that were made largely reflect the drinkers, who are primarily children.

Regular Milk: B

The base of all other flavors of milk; regular milk is the basis for all mammalian life. Its nutrition is the reason animals and humans alike drink it. It has almost all of the nutrients necessary to sustain and build up the human body. This makes it especially popular amongst athletes and bodybuilders who use the high protein content and carbohydrates to prepare for and recover from workouts. On top of that, milk is a refreshing drink when cold. It has a pleasant smoothness to it, but not much in terms of flavor. That is to say that regular milk is very bland. This is not wholly negative, as it proves to be a perfect base for other flavors.

Chocolate Milk: A+

Chocolate seems to be the perfect complement to milk, as when the two are mixed, a magnificent drink is created. This beverage is much more than the sum of its parts. First, chocolate milk is even more nutritious than regular milk. It has a little bit more protein, but more than double the carbohydrates. It also has a more subtle taste than chocolate. The quality of chocolate where it is difficult to eat a lot of it is not present in chocolate milk. It has a creaminess to it that is indescribably great, and not present in regular milk. There is also an addictiveness to chocolate milk, where it leaves you wanting more, much like potato chips. If there were a rating higher than A+, chocolate milk would get it.

“I recently got into drinking chocolate milk, and it is truly amazing. It has completely changed my view of life,” freshman Patrick Heydasch said.

Strawberry Milk: D

On the opposite end of the spectrum, strawberry milk is simply terrible. This drink has no good aspects, other than its equal protein and carbohydrate content to chocolate milk. It primarily uses artificial flavors and ingredients to make it taste like what a robot would probably think strawberries taste like. It is less creamy than its chocolate or regular counterpart, and it does not have the great taste of strawberries.

Frankly, just drink chocolate milk.