Guy Code: Now Leaving The Friend Zone
Feb 4, 2014
Valentine’s Day is around the corner and the commotion over love can really trigger your bottled up feelings for that special someone. But what if the person of interest is your friend? It’s time to leave the friend zone.
- Admit It! They say that the first step in fixing a problem is admitting that there is one. Face it, you’re just friends.
- Redefine How She Sees You! You are at the point where if they thought of you romantically, it would continue with “I’d never date so-and-so, they’re like my brother”. If you are watching The Notebook with her as she rants about her ex, red flags are flying. You need to stop tending to her every need so the possibility of them seeing you as more than a reliable friend opens up. Doing this won’t hurt her feelings or make you seem less desirable; you’re just marking the thin line between human pillow and boyfriend material.
“I think you should hang out with them often. Then one day just take them out to lunch, pay for them, and kiss them goodbye; this way they’ll start to view you as more than a friend,” junior Teague Scanlon said.
- Change Your Game Plan! What you were doing before was obviously not working. Figure out what part of your friendship doesn’t allow you to be more than friends and change it. If you are too close with the person, put some small distance in between. If the subject of conversation always revolves around the one class you share together, get to know them better.
- Flirt! The art of flirting isn’t something we all have under our belts, but there are subtle and easy ways to show your friend you’re “in” to her. Breaking the contact barrier helps. Instead of the standard kiss on the cheek, add a smooth touch on the back (trust me, we notice).
- Just Do It! We all wish we’d had the courage to tell our crush we liked them. There’s that part of our brain that tells us to just do it, and really, why not? Since they’re your friend you know how to approach them and confronting it will get the weight off of your chest.
“Man up, it’s not worth living in uncertainty. A true friend wouldn’t let it get in the way, even if she doesn’t like you back,” senior Sebastian Courtey said.
- Know the Consequences! She’s your friend for a reason and before you declare your feelings to her, you need to know the possible collateral damage. Scenario 1: they don’t feel the same way and it’s highly probable that the next few encounters will be awkward. On the bright side, if both of you are mature enough, the awkwardness will fade and you’ll be able to laugh about it later. Scenario 2: they like you back, you have a valentine this year and a possible relationship is in the picture. That all sounds great, but keep in mind it’s not going to last forever. If your romantic relationship goes downhill, you won’t “still be friends”. Is your friendship worth jeopardizing?
“You shouldn’t try to get out of the friend zone unless you really like the person, have a possibility with them, and are willing to work on being more than friends because if not, it’s not worth messing up your friendship for,” freshman Sigurd Ozols said.
They say once you are stuck in the friend zone there is no way of getting out, but that ideology could not be more wrong. Staying in the friend zone is controlled mostly by how you handle your relationship with the person, so take the plunge and maybe Valentine’s day won’t be so bitter this year.